Insane.
Saturday, 27 November 2010
I've had an insane period of being concious.
I chaired club today, and we watched the episode of
Sayonara Zetusbou Sensei where they're hyping everything at the festival. Chris, Cam and Lee loved this beyond belief. So when the breaks about to finish, I sit on a chair waiting for Laura to tell everyone about the Christmas event, when suddenly I'm surrounded by the trio, my chairs being lifted up in the air, and I'm about 6ft in the air being hyped.
After the usual Tegami Bachi, I showed Pokemon Best Wishes, which the majority of club loved, and I loved the atmosphere in there. It was great, and people genuinely enjoyed it. I've never felt anything like that in WAC. I feel happy that I hosted such a great meeting, I'm proud of it.
After getting to talk to Claky on MSN (for the first time in months, yes!) I asked Kris what he was doing, and I went over to his to play on Halo Reach, which eventually lead to Andy bothering us into walking 15 minutes to McDonalds, just for them not to give us food because people aren't allowed on the Drive Through. It also started snowing on the way, it looked like glitter, it was so pretty!
So we went back to Asda, Kris bought me an Advent Calender, Andy bought me tortilla chips, and then we went back, pigged out. Then we played in the snow, Andy and Kris skid in the snow, it was fun, and now I'm here.
I love my life right now. I like it when I have a good day when nothing seems to really go wrong, and the stuff that usually goes wrong is actually going great for a change. Plus club seemed packed today!
2010
Friday, 26 November 2010
I realise 2010 is actually coming into it's final month. It's terrifying, actually. I feel like this year hasn't been all that bad though. I suppose that it's been good because I've seen a new year through with my university friends, like Chris, Megan, Lee, Cam and Paul.
I've seen the world change with them from cold winter days that looked magical because of the snow, to the spring where everything felt fresh and new, and summer days where we walked around Birmingham and ate in Woktastic with the front doors wide open, and autumn where everything started to turn into wonderful hues of browns and yellows to now, where winder is once again setting in, and we wear ridiculous amounts of layers and more weather appropriate shoes.
I feel like I've done a lot this time around. Usually when a year ends, I'll have a few distant memories with no real change in my life. But this year, I've had wonderful life changing experiences, with wonderful people. I can't remember what my life was like before them, and I'm glad that I've managed to have these awesome times.
I've obviously had my moments of absolute heartbreak, tears, and 4am MSN conversations with Chris complaining about how shit everything is. But when I think about it, nothing is really that bad. I have my moments where I want to just sit down and say "you know what? Fuck this." But I don't do that any more. I'm taking each day as it comes, dealing with problems as they hit me, and coming out the other end of it saying "Wow, I'm a lot stronger than I thought I was."
Before the end of the year, where hopefully I'll be celebrating it with my friends, I'll do a proper write up of the moments that really made this year amazing for me. There may be some things that I'll repeat from previous posts, but it's still going to be nice to wrap it all up into one entry.
So, at the minute, I'm trying to think of things I can do next year to make it a more awesome year than this. It'll probably be hard to beat. I want to carry on feeling happy, like I do most of the time. I feel like I deserve it. It was a weird thing that sparked it off, I suppose.
It was one of those mass texts from Wardy. I haven't really spoken to him much since I left home, so it was a surprise to get it from him. But it said this: A strong person knows how to keep their life in order. Even with teats in their eyes, they still manage to say "I'm okay" with a smile. Send this to a strong person, I just did. Change is coming. Karma saw your sadness and said hard times are over. If you believe, send this to ten people, including me.
Of course I didn't send it on: it would have cost me £1 to send it to ten people, and I would have sent it to the vast majority of my phonebook. But I would have liked to send it on, regardless.
But I have a month to think of what things I can achieve next year. Some of it will just be event related, but I do want to carry on pushing myself a lot harder, so I feel like I've earned more of what I have at the end of it.
Friends [Drunken Post]
Wednesday, 17 November 2010
Moving back to Wolverhampton has been really fucking hard. I've had to start again, make new friends and carry on changing who I am.
I'm glad I've changed. My old friends see it. Chris sees it. Cam sees it more than anyone. Everyone else seems a bit too blind to see it, to be honest. Maybe that's because my time last year was spent in a small circle of friends but that's changed, a lot. I've made a lot of new friends this year. I'm proud of myself, because I've made friends that don't just put up with me because I was dragged along. I've found these new friends that say I can come over whenever I want, because there's always someone in.
I feel a lot more confident because of it.
These new friends are genuinely really nice people who I've had the pleasure on bonding with. Like Kris, Andy, Lee, Richard, Katy, Vaz, Gaz, John, Matt, Craig, David, Scott, Carly. Everyone. There are so many, sometimes I get their names wrong, and they'll get annoyed about it.
I don't get how I can be surrounded by such nice people and still feel so utterly alone at the same time. I miss Claky. I miss Simon. I miss Laura. I miss Chris when he isn't around. I miss my niece. I miss my nephew. I miss my mum, and my dad. When those people are in my life, and just around the corner, I feel okay. I don't feel okay with them not being around anymore.
More than anything, I just wish I had the courage to ask what me and Tom are, because my confidence will never ever take me that far. I wish that he'd ask me first.
I had a nightmare last night, where there were zombies taking over the world, but they couldn't be killed. My dad looked after me in my grandmas bungalow. I remember I was terrified, and everything was on fire. I woke up and couldn't move. But I still felt kind of happy because my dad looked after me more in that dream than he ever has before.
Wind Waker.
Thursday, 11 November 2010
I forgot how amazing this game actually was.
WAC Bonfire Night 2010
Sunday, 7 November 2010
While I write a proper blog about my life, here are some photos from the Bonfire~
Wednesday, 3 November 2010
Sea otters hold hands when they sleep, so they don’t drift away from each other
